Friday Fieldwork: Wrestle First, Lecture Later
Engage the wild. Then guide it.
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This week’s article, “Living Room Wrestling: The Wildness of Connection,” explores what wrestling has taught me about fatherhood, connection, and raising boys without taming their wildness.
There’s this moment — maybe you’ve felt it —
where the hug lingers just a little too long…
and suddenly, you’re under attack.
A sneaky smirk.
A flying elbow.
The thunder of footsteps from down the hall.
And just like that, the living room turns into a wrestling mat.
It’s wild.
It’s loud.
It almost always ends with someone in timeout or someone missing a sock.
But somewhere beneath the chaos, something quieter is happening.
Not control. Not correction.
Connection.
A different kind of presence —
One only a dad can give.
One boys will go to battle for.
This Week’s Fieldwork: Wrestle First, Lecture Later
Here’s your 3-step reset for the next time your kid turns a hug into a takedown:
1. Pause and join in.
Don’t miss the moment. Even 90 seconds of wrestle-play can communicate more than a thousand lectures.
2. Narrate the connection.
Say things like, “You are so strong!” or “You almost got me!”
This builds confidence and trust — not just adrenaline.
3. Hold boundaries with warmth.
No fish-hooking. No licking. (Seriously.)
Boundaries make wildness safe — not stifled.
Fatherhood isn’t about stopping the wildness. It’s about stepping into it and leading from the inside.
